West B Test Writing: Revision and Editing Skills 5 — Questions and Answers
Question 1: Which sentence demonstrates effective use of subordination to show the relationship between two ideas?
- The power went out. We could not finish the project.
- The power went out, we could not finish the project.
- Because the power went out, we could not finish the project. (Correct answer)
- The power went out and we could not finish the project and it was a problem.
Correct answer: Because the power went out, we could not finish the project.
The subordinating conjunction 'because' clearly establishes a cause-and-effect relationship between the two clauses.
Question 2: A writer's paragraph lacks unity. Which sentence should be removed? 'Exercise improves cardiovascular health. It also strengthens muscles. Regular workouts can boost mood. My gym is open 24 hours.'
- Exercise improves cardiovascular health.
- It also strengthens muscles.
- Regular workouts can boost mood.
- My gym is open 24 hours. (Correct answer)
Correct answer: My gym is open 24 hours.
The sentence about the gym's hours does not support the paragraph's main idea about health benefits of exercise.
Question 3: Which revision best replaces the cliché in this sentence? 'The student worked hard as a bee to finish the assignment.'
- The student worked harder than hard to finish the assignment.
- The student worked diligently to finish the assignment before the deadline. (Correct answer)
- The student was very, very busy finishing the assignment.
- The student finished the assignment quickly like a busy bee.
Correct answer: The student worked diligently to finish the assignment before the deadline.
Replacing the cliché with specific, direct language ('diligently,' 'before the deadline') strengthens the writing.
Question 4: Which sentence correctly punctuates a direct quotation?
- The teacher said, 'please open your textbooks to page fifty.'
- The teacher said, "Please open your textbooks to page fifty." (Correct answer)
- The teacher said "please open your textbooks to page fifty".
- The teacher said: please open your textbooks to page fifty.
Correct answer: The teacher said, "Please open your textbooks to page fifty."
A direct quotation begins with a capital letter and is enclosed in double quotation marks, with a comma after the signal phrase.
Question 5: Which revision best addresses the logical fallacy of overgeneralization? 'All teenagers are irresponsible with money.'
- Most teenagers are very irresponsible with money management.
- Many teenagers are still developing financial literacy skills. (Correct answer)
- Teenagers never manage their money properly, ever.
- All young teenagers completely lack money skills.
Correct answer: Many teenagers are still developing financial literacy skills.
Replacing 'all' with 'many' and providing context ('developing financial literacy') makes the claim more accurate and defensible.
Question 6: Which edit best improves the awkward phrasing? 'The reason why she succeeded was because she practiced.'
- The reason why she succeeded was due to the fact that she practiced.
- She succeeded because she practiced. (Correct answer)
- The reason she succeeded was the practicing she did.
- The reason she did succeed was because she practiced hard.
Correct answer: She succeeded because she practiced.
'The reason why... was because' is redundant; the concise revision eliminates the redundancy entirely.
Question 7: A student writes an essay with this concluding sentence: 'In conclusion, I have talked about the three main causes of the Civil War.' Which revision best improves the conclusion?
- In summary, I discussed the three main causes of the Civil War.
- To conclude, the main causes of the Civil War were as I have shown.
- Understanding the economic, political, and social tensions that caused the Civil War helps us recognize how unresolved conflicts can divide a nation. (Correct answer)
- Thus, I have shown the causes of the Civil War, which I discussed.
Correct answer: Understanding the economic, political, and social tensions that caused the Civil War helps us recognize how unresolved conflicts can divide a nation.
An effective conclusion synthesizes the essay's argument and leaves the reader with a broader insight rather than merely restating what was discussed.
West B Test Writing: Revision and Editing Skills 5
Which sentence demonstrates effective use of subordination to show the relationship between two ideas?