CRC Communication Techniques & Strategies 2 — Questions and Answers
Question 1: A client reports that arguments with their partner always escalate because they both keep bringing up past grievances. Which communication technique should the coach recommend?
- Kitchen-sinking
- Staying present-focused (Correct answer)
- Using ultimatums
- Avoiding the topic entirely
Correct answer: Staying present-focused
Present-focused communication keeps discussions on the current issue rather than piling on historical grievances, reducing escalation.
Question 2: When teaching couples about the 'four horsemen' identified by Gottman, which communication behavior is described as dismissing a partner's feelings as irrelevant or unimportant?
- Criticism
- Contempt (Correct answer)
- Stonewalling
- Defensiveness
Correct answer: Contempt
Contempt involves treating a partner with disrespect and dismissiveness, including eye-rolling, mockery, and invalidating their feelings.
Question 3: A client says they shut down completely during conflicts and stop responding. Which Gottman 'horseman' does this represent, and what should the coach recommend?
- Criticism; use 'I' statements
- Contempt; practice empathy
- Stonewalling; physiological self-soothing (Correct answer)
- Defensiveness; take responsibility
Correct answer: Stonewalling; physiological self-soothing
Stonewalling is emotional withdrawal during conflict, and the antidote is physiological self-soothing such as taking a 20-minute break.
Question 4: In motivational interviewing used within relationship coaching, what does the acronym OARS stand for?
- Open questions, Affirmations, Reflections, Summaries (Correct answer)
- Observations, Assessments, Redirections, Solutions
- Outcomes, Actions, Risks, Support
- Open dialogue, Accountability, Rapport, Safety
Correct answer: Open questions, Affirmations, Reflections, Summaries
OARS — Open questions, Affirmations, Reflections, and Summaries — are the core communication skills in motivational interviewing.
Question 5: A coach notices a client nods and says 'yes' while their arms are crossed and they lean away. What skill should the coach apply?
- Paraphrasing the client's verbal statement
- Attending to nonverbal cues and gently naming the discrepancy (Correct answer)
- Ignoring body language and focusing on words only
- Redirecting to a different topic
Correct answer: Attending to nonverbal cues and gently naming the discrepancy
Skilled coaches attend to nonverbal communication and can gently reflect discrepancies between verbal and body language to deepen awareness.
Question 6: What is the purpose of a 'softened startup' in couples communication?
- To avoid raising difficult topics altogether
- To begin a complaint without blame by describing feelings and needs (Correct answer)
- To use humor to deflect from serious issues
- To postpone the conversation until both partners are calm
Correct answer: To begin a complaint without blame by describing feelings and needs
A softened startup involves expressing a concern with 'I feel' language and a specific request rather than a global criticism of the partner.
Question 7: A client wants to express frustration but fears their partner will become defensive. Which sentence structure best models non-defensive communication?
- 'You always make me feel ignored when you're on your phone.'
- 'I feel disconnected when dinner time involves phones, and I'd love device-free time together.' (Correct answer)
- 'Why do you never put your phone down when I'm talking?'
- 'Everyone agrees that phone use at dinner is rude.'
Correct answer: 'I feel disconnected when dinner time involves phones, and I'd love device-free time together.'
This response uses an 'I feel' statement, a specific observable behavior, and a positive need — reducing the chance of triggering defensiveness.
